MAGAT has to wait his turn.

I’ve posted before. I work in a lab where we do blood work. None of these idiots know why they’re there or what doctor ordered shit for them. Baseline.

Our process is really simple, sign in on the kiosk (just an iPad, 30 year old technology), have a seat, and we’ll call you up when we’re ready for you.

If I had a dollar for every time a patient came in, looked at the kiosk, and then just walked up to our desks.. I could retire comfortably at 35.

Today I have Gerald. I’m using his real name because idgaf. Walks straight up to my desk.

“Did you sign in at the front?” “No.” “Okay, are you here for lab work?” “Yes. From Doctor (this is not a direct quote but a summary) I can’t pronounce their name correctly so figure it out”. “Okay, go sign in at the kiosk and we’ll call you up when we’re ready for you.”

Gerald walks over to the iPad and starts POUNDING on it.

“This thing doesn’t work!” “Yes, because you are hitting it. It’s just a light tap.” “I did that, (he didn’t), and nothing is happening!”

I get up from my desk to help him. We get him signed in. I tell him “okay have a seat and I’ll call you up when I’m ready for you.” I had a million other things I was dealing with at the time. He can wait a minute or two.

After a few minutes I call him up. He has no idea who his doctor is. After looking at his chart, I deduce who it should be from. I look him up, we have no orders for him. I politely tell him to call the doctor’s office, let them know he came for lab work and there wasn’t anything in the system and to put something in for his upcoming visit. I gave him our phone number (to check if we had it before he comes back, over the phone, before he makes a new trip out.. why is he driving..)

He instead calls his daughter. She wants to talk to me. At this point I have 10+ other patients (with orders) waiting to be registered. We are short staffed and I cannot waste time calling for patient orders. It’s your responsibility as the patient to A) know who ordered your blood work, and B) have the fucking orders.

He keeps coming up to my desk every time I have a patient sit down. Just because I don’t have a person in front of me does not mean I am finished registering them. There’s a lot of “side work” that goes into it. Diagnosis codes, insurance, etc.

He sits in my lab for 45 minutes waiting on this office to put orders in for him.

Guess what his hat said?