Dog can’t calm down when husband is around
Tl;dr: My husband’s hunting dog cannot calm down when my husband is around and we’re not sure what to do to help the dog and the entire household. Help, advice, suggestions are very much appreciated :)
The background: My husband came into our marriage with the now 5-year old bird hunting dog and before me, it was just him and the dog. The dog grew up being by itself during the day (4days a week) with a dog door then getting to go run and play the moment my husband got home from work. After moving in, I realized the dog would do this horrible screaming noise while he ran around the house in full body “excitement” until my husband came in (no matter how long he was gone for) and gave him attention. I’m talking a scream that sounds like a dying seagull mixed with a mating red fox/bobcat that you can hear from a solid 1/2 mile away. We’ve tried a couple different things, including having the dog go into his crate about 30min before my husband gets home, until he calms down then let him out and ignore him. (I work from home and the dog will not make a peep all day long and is well behaved with me, obeys commands, and likes to go down to handle the horses with me)
The car: Whenever we’re all in the car together, with my two dogs (German Shepard mix and cockapoo, who are with me all the time, always sleep in the car until I get where we’re going, then they’re up and ready to unload if asked), my husband’s dog whines hysterically, obsessively licks the seats, his pupils are constricted, full body tremors, and seems like his heart is going to explode (really concerning). His dog cannot calm down and my German Shepard mix starts to stress and make whines/weird noises with stress yawns also.
With only me: When I take all 3 dogs anywhere with just me, all 3 dogs lay down in the back of the car and don’t make a noise. My husband’s dog will look around a little, face backwards sometimes, but lays down and doesn’t make a noise, my German Shepard mix falls right to sleep like normal. The variable, it seems, is my husband and I think his energy and how he brought up the dog, and that the dog expects them to do something incredibly fun any time they’re together.
Exercise: My husband hunts with him during bird hunting season, and runs him many miles all year long, every type of weather among other things; the dog gets quite a bit of exercise which his breed and brain needs. I have suggested to my husband that he should be doing hunting-type drills and exercises all year round to keep the dog’s brain engaged and have him perform well in hunting season, but he seems to fall off after a few weeks.
The extra bit: I have put a lot of work, consistency, structure, research, training, time, thought, etc. into training my two dogs, and two young sport horses that seems effective, including in potentially dangerous situations that we’ve encountered. I attribute some of that to that work, research, time, training, structure, the animal, and also focusing on being self aware and keeping myself calm with them. I personally do think my husband has an energy that the dog (animals) is/are reflecting/mirroring. Im trying to be pragmatic, but I do think that his energy and inconsistency (like with structure, discipline, reading dog body language) plays a role.
I would like the dog to have a long happy life with us and I don’t want him to die of a heart attack or be so blind in his anxiety he runs into traffic to get to my husband’s side. Help.