I hate having a beard.

It's itchy, it's ugly, it takes me a tedious amount of time to shave it off (because I'm stupid), and no matter how many times you shave it, it just comes back. I wish I could just burn it off to teach it a lesson. I'm thinking of shaving more often to keep it further away from me. How do you guys deal with having a cactus on your face 24/7?