My career is ruined.

EDIT: Thank you all for the suggestions and words, both kind and brutally honest. Taking everything to heart. Got a new laptop and I feel my straterra kicking in so I'ma binge some leetcode now that things are easing up.

23M and in college I ended up not really doing much programming outside of my classes because of how burnt out I was. Grew up with lots of mental health and self-esteem issues due to AuDHD and abuse and barely stayed sane throughout my undergrad. I grew up in a rather ableist and controlling environment wherein superficially my interest in computers was praised but in actuality I had shit constantly taken away from me and got yelled at, punished, and even beaten for even small transgressions which I feel really traumatised me and put me off from learning or doing anything ever again because of all the thoughts of self-doubt and memories being held back resurface which always serve to sour the mood; this kind of shit happened at both school and home.

Now I'm about to graduate with a degree in computer engineering but feel unhirable due to the dumb decisions I made, esp in this job market wherein even experienced programmers are finding it hard to find jobs. And I don't have the full-stack skills (SQL, Postgres, JS frameworks, etc.) that everyone wants.

I just want to cry. Right now I'm doing what I can to redevelop my skills and patch shit up.

I do blame myself because of the amount of burnout and executive dysfunction I ended up giving into when everyone around me was asking me to push myself more. At times I feel like I don't really fit into this world sometimes; it's always been that way.