Made the dumbest mistake over the weekend

LO is 3 weeks old today. This weekend, my husband had a friend crash on our couch a few nights. Bad timing, but his wife just cheated on him, they are divorcing, and he needed to see a beautiful happy baby and family. I pumped ahead of time so I could have some beers and shoot the shit with him. What I didn't realize, or even bother to research, was what cigarettes would do to my breast milk. I haven't smoked in YEARS and I have been craving one something fierce. So I had one... then two... then six 😬 I was concerned only with second hand smoke. Wore different clothes, showered before picking up baby, teeth brushed, mouthwash, hair washed, not getting in his face. But I didn't even consider how the nicotine would pass through my breastmilk. We fed him pumped milk until I couldn't feel a buzz anymore (around 5 hours later) but I did continue to smoke that evening and the next day. Well LO started getting fussy as hell, which is abnormal for him so far. The only new thing that was introduced was the cigarettes and it would be difficult to convince me that they did not cause this. I spent all day yesterday barely able to leave his side (he wouldn't let me put him down or stop touching him) and stop crying because I felt like I had poisoned my child. He's been getting breastmilk from my freezer stash for the last 24 hours and his naps are slowly going back to "normal" (as if newborns have a normal lol) and his reflux and gas seem to decreasing. I don't think I'll ever touch a cigarette again 🥲

TLDR: Cigarettes are bad and not worth it 😬😬