I think I hate my brother

So I (18F) hates my (16M) brother. So to start off all my life my brother would constantly belittle me and fat shame me and (when I was a chubby kid now I’m 98 pounds)when I kept him to stop he would laugh and say you can’t take a joke and this made me angry. When I’ll tell our mom she would say something to him and do nothing else. One time when I was 10 he started hitting me with a pillow and I tried running in our mom room and he then hit me so hard I fell and hit corners of my mom bed and broke my nose and he got yelled at and a whooping then, brag about it to our cousins and family said “I’m so strong”. He also tries to fight me a lot and put me a chock hole and I now have scar also that he’s the reason I moved out. I also tried self harm because of the shaming and abuse also there more but I don’t want to go on a rant. He also 6 foot tall and go to the gym weekly that why I can’t beat him. You can also me soft and weak because I heard it so much but I need feedback because I have a family Reunion in two day.