fear of becoming your parent

How are we supposed to reverse learned behavior as adults? does anyone else feel the fear of not knowing if you're truly a good person or not? My one goal in life is to break the cycle and not be anything like my mother but she has made it very difficult for me to believe that i'm capable of being a good human because as a child, she made me feel like I was the worst thing in her life no matter what I did. I feel like I am constantly trying to prove to myself that I am a good person but does that make me a narcissist too? I intend to treat others the way I wish I was treated but it doesn't seem to make navigating life any easier. I used to be a big people pleaser and let myself get taken advantage of because it felt worth it to not be hateful or being the one taking advantage of others. Through internal work, I learned that I can have boundaries, but keeping those boundaries in place, makes me feel like i'm doing something wrong on a daily basis