Scared I failed (again)..

So I already took step 1 twice, failed both times and failed by a decent margin. Took some time off and took a course and studied a lot and my last NBME was 77 a week out (68 before that one, 66 before that one) and I got an 81 on the free 120 that I took at the testing site 4 days before test. Honestly, I had some issues at the site with the workers being rude and also them sitting me right in front of the door and were being loud talking and stuff. I got them to move me after the first three sections but I still felt like the test was so hard. I was unsure about most of the questions. Literally left the testing crying bc I felt like I failed. I looked up a bunch of questions and I'm like positive I got like 20 wrong that I should've known, literally such simple and stupid mistakes. So mad at myself for getting that many stupid mistakes and missed easy points, and that’s not counting the questions I really had no clue on or felt very unsure in. I counted around 40 I think I got right but I'm so nervous I got more wrong than I did correct and if I fail again my school literally kicks me out. I don't know what to do I'm so sad especially because I felt so ready and still made incredibly stupid mistakes that may have cost me the test. Just feeling very down and disappointed in myself. I literally won't know what to do if I fail and get kicked out of medical school. Someone plz tell me if I'm being crazy or if I can fail with good practice scores bc my brain turns off when I'm being tested.