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Acceptable-Cap-574

2025-03-14 03:11:43

I miss breastfeeding

Moist_Cantaloupe_340

2025-03-13 11:19:02

Husband getting advice from others

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You could do both, you don’t have to choose. Bottle for substance and breast for comfort/sleep if you don’t feel like baby is getting enough.

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Yes, I try to wake him up and nothing works! He’s a good sleeper so it has its perks lol

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Don’t give up. I had a ton of issues breastfeeding in the first month. Also had a sleepy baby like yours, and we had to get mean about it, pinch him, tap on the cheekbones, use cold wipes, etc., which felt awful and night feeds would sometimes take about an hour, because I was aiming for 15 minutes of active feeding on each side. I can sympathise with the stress of not knowing how much they have. All you need to worry about though is wet and dirty nappies! You can weigh the baby every other week for reassurance. Weekly is fine too but bear in mind it’s normal to drop a bit of weight on occasion especially when weighing so often, because it fluctuates so much. They may have peed just before a weigh in and that’ll definitely show! Next problem I had was the pain, it got so bad from him being on the boob for hours. I won’t bore you with the details as it may not be relevant. But it got better after a month. I had to combi feed at that stage with BF, pumped milk and formula. Then little one refused a bottle. Next thing I know breastfeeding became the easiest thing in the world. I still do it at 13 months old, and I count my blessings for never having to wash those damn pump parts and bottles and worry about the temperature or how long the milks been out. And the bonding, I didn’t feel anything special at first but now, it’s magical. It also calms my baby down instantly and I love that. I don’t mean to put pressure on you, I just want to say keep going as it often gets better. What helped me was support and encouragement from a lactation specialist and my lovely supporting partner who once ran around stores looking for formula at 3am because we were scared the baby would starve when my milk just didn’t flow at all (hello stress). If you need to introduce formula - do it and don’t beat yourself up. There’s nothing wrong with top ups or even complete formula feeding, but stress is awful for your supply and it blocks letdown too. Just keep trying and don’t stress about it. When I combi fed I would always start with BF, then bottle. Gradually bottle intake dropped to about 20% then he refused a bottle all together. I was worried he wouldn’t have enough milk then but my supply increased, that was at 2m. If your BF journey does end early, that’s ok too, please never blame yourself. It’s different for everyone and you will always have your early days to look back at. There are so many other ways for you to bond. You’ll see soon enough all he’s going to want to do is cuddle with you. Your baby is so lucky to have a mum like you x

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Thank you so much! I have been combo feeding just to relieve some of the stress, but I think I’m going to try adding in breast feedings again and see what happens. It’s crazy the pressure we put on ourselves. I went into pregnancy with no problems using formula and it has been such an emotional decision to start using it I don’t even know why! Logically, I know it’s completely fine and sometimes I feel he even reacts better to it in regard to reflux and such, but I still have guilt not doing full breast milk!

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Ugh I feel the same! My breasts start leaking when my baby cries so the thought of just leaving them self soothe is physically uncomfortable for me. But dad doesn’t know, so I’ll share that with him.

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The other day I was getting ready to take a shower. My husband walked in with the baby crying and I started leaking all over the floor! lol I totally understand wanting to comfort your baby as soon as they start crying. I am the same way. However, I do make sure to take care of myself first. If I need to use the restroom, finish my meal, brush my teeth, I will let him cry even if it takes 5-10 minutes. Obviously I wouldn’t leave him crying for an extended time, but I don’t think it’s bad to leave them for a couple minutes and to see if they self soothe. I don’t think your husband means any harm, he just doesn’t have that maternal instinct we do. I heard we are wired to feel uncomfortable when we hear our babies cry. Not sure if that’s true or not.

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